Momma Bear

On Mother's Day, Blake and I were in a fender bender on our way to my parents for dinner. First things first, yes we are all okay. We were stuck in bumper to bumper traffic and only going about 5-7 mph (another blessing) and we hit a very large truck who didn't really receive any damage even though ours was totaled. The driver told us he had to slam on his breaks too, we just happened to be the ones in the long line up to cause the accident. But honestly, I'm glad it was us and not someone behind us, which I'll explain more on that later.

Before we even had time to really register what had happened I was unbuckling my seat belt and climbing into the back seat to check on Theodore. The little dude had slept through the whole thing and was completely fine. Immediately I was bawling and just felt this overwhelming feeling of something I can't really put into words except to say "Momma Bear". And this is exactly why I was grateful we weren't hit. If we had been hit Theodore would have taken the brunt of the accident. 

This Momma Bear feeling is something I've never felt before and I kind of hate that an accident is how I had to feel it for the first time, but also, I'm grateful I felt it. It helped me realize how much I loved our little guy and that I would do absolutely anything for him. I had been beating myself up that I didn't feel this overwhelming bond and love for him. I knew I loved him but it wasn't the way I had always imagined a mothers love to be. But at that moment I immediately knew I did feel that way about him. 

This quote describes perfectly what I felt. I had read quotes like this my whole life and imagined that is what I'd experience when I had my baby and during this whole experience I did. And I was truly amazed and finally understood what my mom has always said she felt for me and my siblings. 

So I know this isn't in time for mothers day by any means but I just wanted to share my experience and also do a tribute to all mothers out there who are exhausted, frazzled, out of their minds raising children. They are doing it because they love their children in such a way that only a mother can understand. I for one am so grateful that I've been given the gift to love my little guy the way that I do and that my mom always loved me the way that she did, and still does. 

And honestly, I don't know if anyone will read this, or if it even makes sense. But I wanted to write it so when I'm having a rough day I can look back and be reminded of the deep love I have for my little boy.